No Pin Bun #2 – The Goddess Bun

Hey y’all! Here’s another No Pin Loc Bun that I came up with. I think this along with the first bun that I did can also be done on loose hair, braids etc and it is so elegant that it can just as easily be used for occasions like weddings, balls etc, where you are dressed to the nines.

Fit for a Goddess! lol

Check out the tutorial video here;

See ya in the next post.

Loc Updo – An Elegant No Pins Bun

Hey y’all. It’s been a minute, right, LOL. Here’s a little tutorial I did last year for a high updo/loc bun using no pins at all to keep it up. Of course, my locs are a bit long, so if you have shorter locs you may have to use a few pins.

It is perfect for the summer when you want to get your locs off of your neck or anytime of the year.

Or when you wanna dress up and wear a simple, yet elegant updo.

Hope you like it and if you do this with your own twist on it let me know in the comments below.

Winter Savings Tips pt 3

Long time no see right?? Omg, it has been awhile…a long while. LOL

I wanted to share this video I did on my YouTube channel on things/ways that I use to conserve my heat and thus help lower those winter heating bills. Y’all I can’t stand having high winter heating bills. Call me cheap but I can think of many other things to do with that money!

Hope that it is useful to you.

Braidlocks Questions from a Reader

Hi everyone!! Omg, Long time see or hear right??

I got a couple of questions from someone who apparently stopped by the blog and I thought that I’d answer it here as it might be questions that others may have who are considering getting Braidlocks.

“….Comment: I wanted locks for 12 years now. I didn’t know there was so many kinds of them. I do like the Mircrolocks.I saw a ad online there was also Braidlocks. I like them much better.
I wanted to know when they lock do you have to get them every 4 -8 weeks? I been without a relaxer for 12 years, I don’t want to go back.

With Braidlocks do you have to wait 3 months before you wash your hair? I check out a book on dreads it said that in there, I said that is so nasty…


Let me first say congratulations for being without a relaxer for 12 years!! Bravo as that is worth acknowledging!!! Also thank you for the questions as I am using it is an opportunity to come out of (thought it may be brief) my hermitage in terms of writing. lol

Ok, now let’s get to the rest of the comment/questions.

Microlocks, Braidlocks, Sisterlocks, Traditional, Freeform, etc…they are all dreadlocks/locs. However, in the last 12 years or more actually, there are many more methods/techniques to start and make dreadlocks than there were in the past have come about and in my opinion, that’s a good thing!!

Now Braidlocks specifically, is a method for starting dreadlocks by sectioning off one’s hair,  but instead of twisting the hair into comb coils as in the case of Traditional locs or interlocking the length of the sections as in the case of Microlocs, the hair braided and left in that state to lock up. As time goes by the braided section will do its magic, looking less and less like a braid and more like a loc until they fully mature and get to the point where no one will be able to tell that you started your locs with braids. As the hair grows, in other words the new growth, is maintained using a method that suits the hair and the person’s lifestyle. This leads me to the next part of your question.


How do you maintain the Braidlocks?


The new growth can be maintained using a variety of methods ie freeform (no maintenance of the new growth aside from pulling them apart to maintain a certain size if desired),  using the same twisting method that folks with Traditional locks use, or interlocking which is my method of choice.

I interlock my new growth because my hair texture is very fine, thin, soft and loosely curled in many areas of my head.  The frequency will be very personal to you, according to your hair growth and density. If you have a lot of hair that is quite dense, you may need to interlock the new growth every 4 weeks. If your hair texture is similar to mine and is slow-growing, you can go 8 weeks or maybe more. It also depends on how small or large your locs are as well.


The last question; Do you have to wait 3 months before you wash?



The answer to that question is a big fat NO!! That is one of the advantages of braidlocks as the hair tends to stay braided and therefore together during washing and so the hair is encouraged to lock. This is a great thing if you have fine and/or loosely textured hair and if the braidlock comes undone, you can easily braid that one or the few back up yourself without having to wait until your next trip to the loctian if you are using one. Also washing encourages the hair to tangle, merge and, marry with the shed hair, which is what dreadlocks essentially are. So you can wash you hair as much as you need or want to.

Now I am by no means an expert, nor am I a loctian or cosmetologist. What I am telling you is based on my experience of having braidlocks for almost 10 years.

Wow, it does not seem like it has been that long.

Thank you again for the questions and I hope that this post answered them. For my long time readers, thank you so much for still hanging with me and new folks to the blog…I will try not to stay away for so long. 🙂

For Those Who Hurt On Mother’s Day

Give yourself a hug, flowers or whatever makes you happy.

john pavlovitz


Today is Mother’s Day.

For many people that means flowers and handmade cards and brunches and hugs and laughter. It means celebration and gratitude and rejoicing.

But for some it just means tears.

For many moms and adult children out there, this day is a stark unsolicited reminder of what was but no longer is, or it is a heavy holiday of mourning what never was at all.

This day might bring with it the scalding sting of grief for the empty chair around a table.

It might come with choking regret for a relationship that has been horribly severed.

It might be a day of looking around at other mothers and other children, and feeling the unwelcome intrusion of jealousy that comes with comparison.

Consider this a love letter to you who are struggling today; you whose Mother’s Day experience might be rather bittersweet— or perhaps only bitter.

This is consent to feel fully the contents of your own heart…

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Happy Birthday Blog

Ok, I know y’all are saying….what?! Two posts in the same month, back to back?! Well, I’m noting a special occasion and that is….

Happy 5th Birthday to my blog!! It’s special day was actually yesterday February 8th.

Wow…5 years! I can’t believe it has been that long. And a few of you have been with me for the entire 5 years.

I want to thank all of you, whether you’ve been here with me from day 1 when I was on Blogger or have joined me since my move to WordPress a year ago. I really appreciate all of you as y’all have made this writing thang a wonderful addition to my life. 🙂

How I Combat Winter Loc Dryness

Hi everyone! I’m back with a post to discuss an email question I got about loc dryness and winter weather especially baby locs, where it’s not advised to put any oil on them at that stage of development.

I think there are a few things that need to be looked at. Now this list is not necessarily in any particular order of importance though the first one I’m gonna list…is.

1. The amount of water you are drinking and your diet in general.

The body needs water and nutrients to do all the things it needs to do to keep you upright and on this side of the dirt.  lol  Our hair while serving a purposeful function, is not necessary for our survival and is therefore last on the line when the nutrients are dished out. So, if there is not enough coming in, your hair ain’t gonna get any. lol  Make sure you get enough of  the good stuff, ie veggies, fruits  water so that there will be enough left over for your hair/locs after the body has gotten what it needs. I’ve noticed when I’ve stepped up my veggie intake, my locs are better for having done that.

2.  Product buildup on your hair before locking.

If you are about to loc your hair or have just started the locking process, I would recommend clarifying your hair. I wish I would have done this before locking my hair. See the next point about why.

3. The shampoo you’re using.

The type of shampoo you are using can make a huge difference in how your locs/hair retain moisture. If your hair is  sensitive to silicone and they buildup on the hair or are already built up on the hair, this can prevent absorption of moisture into the locs. Some natural soaps/shampoos can have the same effect though not from silicone but from other ingredients  although natural, not agreeing with your hair. Dr. Bronner’s soap had this effect on my locs. My use of shea butter in my loose hair days and a brief period after the year mark had the same effect as well.

4. Your drying method.

I mentioned in an earlier update that I air dry my locs. I noticed that when I allow my locs to air dry, they stayed hydrated and soft longer. For the last year I have not had to spritz my locs with water in between washes. I feel that this is due to letting my locs keep all that they can, the moisture that’s put in when washing and rinsing. When my locs were babies, I would sit under the dryer in the winter. However, I had to spritz them everyday because they felt scratchy and crunchy. This started to not make sense to me so I stopped using the hair/blow dryer.

Now I just washed my locs this past Thursday putting a scant…and I do mean scant amount of oil on them because I’m out of oil that’s been strained of the herbs that were infused into the oil and I was too lazy to strain the bottle I’ve got in order to use the oil. So you might as well say I did not put any oil on my locs. lol It’s now Saturday, 2 days later and my locs still feel moisturized.  Ah ha..this is great because that means my oil will last even longer than it already does! Which means…less work for me!! As I  get older, I’m all about simplifying my life. Any who, the drying thang brings me to the next point.

   5. Forced Air Heating & Cooling

Ok how does a hair/blow dryer dry? The answer is in the label especially the blow dryer…it blows out heated air. And what is one  of the things we naturals are told to decrease because of the (pun intended) drying effects…heat. The heated air from the dryer is forcing the moisture out of your locs/hair faster than it can absorb it.

Well the furnace/heater that are in a lot of homes is basically a big ole dryer. So, it is going to have the same effect on your hair  as using a hair dryer, just not as fast. That’s why you hear the experts saying if you are plagued with sinus issues, scratchy  throats, dry skin etc in the winter, the humidity level in your home is too low. These big dryers are…drying out the humidity in the air to heat the air quickly.

So, if you have not allowed your locs/hair to soak up all the moisture they could hold and you are in a forced air heated environment…weIl you’re probably gonna have dry locs/hair. This means you will have to replace that moisture somehow which will mean spritzing with water as often as needed. If the humidity levels in your home are low it may help to have some water sitting in a few bowls around the house.

This winter is the first one where I’m not using any forced air heating and I can tell the difference in my locs as I have cut down the amount of oil I was putting on them after washing for reasons stated above. See, laziness pays off sometimes. 🙂  Plus I do not have a low humidity issue in my home.

Now I know the question asked was about winter dryness but the same thing applies in the summer as a lot of folks spend a lot of time indoors under air conditioning. AC works under the same basic principle. Instead of forcing in heated air, it’s forcing in cooled air with the moisture (humidity) removed from it. This is why your locs/hair can feel dry in the summer as well even though you live in an area with humid summers.

6. Cotton pillowcases, scarves, hats.

Yes, these things can rob your locs/hair of moisture so wear a satiny type fabric under your hats if you are in an area where you  need to put a hat on your head in the winter. I wear one of those cheap, polyester sleep caps that you can get at the beauty  supply store under my hat when I have to wear one. I got mine from Wal-Mart, in the hair accessories aisle.

As for the pillowcase, you don’t have to spend a ton of money on satin pillowcases. I just got a yard of satiny like material that was  on sale and tied it on my pillow as a pillowcase. I have a post of it here. One of these days, I’ll actually sew the fabric as a pillowcase…maybe. 😉

Well that’s all that comes to mind for to ideas about why your locs are dry and how I combat winter dryness or dryness period. I hope that helps and if any of you guys that are vets or any loc’ers in the loc game have any other tips or things that you do, put them in the comments below. 🙂



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The Unspoken Contract of Elder Care and Their Lifestyle Health Issues

Warning: This Area Contains Tobacco Smoke

Warning: This Area Contains Tobacco Smoke (Photo credit: tbone_sandwich)


I’m no health expert or any kind of expert for that matter nor do I pretend to be one on this blog. I just talk about things the way that I see and experience them firsthand, which will sometimes ruffle feathers because as I mentioned in my last post, I don’t always follow status quo thinking especially when it makes absolutely no sense. You know how the saying goes ” the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result”.

What I want to talk about today is the unspoken contract of adult children caring for their aging parents/relatives, specifically elders with chronic health issues that are “accepted” as issues that come along with aging. Though seemingly unrelated, this is a continuation of my last post as it ties into the general point I am making. And that is the program we’ve been given to follow is imploding under its own weight and is no longer viable. Not that it ever was in the first place. The only reason its been able to continue in the state is has is because only a brave few had the gonads to question it and when they did, they faced being ostracized by society. Also because of the numbers of those benefitting from going along to get along were far greater, even though they did not realize the benefits they were getting would later be ripped away because it can’t be sustained. No living being can defy natural law.

If one does just a little research, they’ll find that diet and lifestyle plays a huge role in health and well-being. Many of the labeled dis-eases are preventable and where there are “inheritances”, the switch can be kept in the “Off” position by diet and lifestyle. The sad thing about this is that a lot of this research is not new as in the recent decade. For example, I remember as a small child back in the 70s (yep, I’m seasoned) commercials on TV from the Surgeon General about the dangers of cigarette smoking and secondhand smoke. There are other studies about missing nutrients and health that date back to the 1930s! Waaay before my time…but I think you see what I mean. Now granted some of the research is skewed, which is why one should check who is doing or more importantly, funding the research. Follow the money.

Getting back to my point, its unreasonable and utterly selfish to expect adult children to care for their parents when they (the parents) have lived a lifestyle of smoking, drinking alcohol and/or the SAD (Standard American Diet) for decades and steadily refusing to change their habits when this knowledge has been easily accessible. Maybe not as accessible as it is today but the library was and is still around so there really is no excuse.

Now I know this seems like imposing control or taking away somebody’s right to live the way they choose. Nope, not at all as I’m a live and let live kind of person. If you want to sniff glue, formaldehyde, paint thinner, eat bacon, one at a time or all at once, it makes no difference to me as long as YOU suffer the consequences that come along with that choice that YOU made. Just as this is your right, it is also the right of the adult child to choose not to devote their resources (one of their most precious resources is time) having to deal with you. Sorry parents but this is not a one way street as you have manipulated it to be when the child was under the legal age to enter into a contract.

In rebuttal there have been statements made to me directly and indirectly “Aunt Mary smoked for 60 years and lived to age 92”, “Grandma grew up eating sausage, bacon, pork chops and eggs every morning” or Grandpa drank for years and lived ’til 80″ etc.

When I hear statements like this I chuckle under my breath because it immediately tells me they want to justify continuing their behavior followed by guilt inducing statements to continue or start the adult child’s help. Also it’s pretty well-known that most folks did not live past 70 and the few that did live past those ages living that kind of lifestyle did not live totally independent of some kind of family help.

I’ve even heard older folks say” I’m gonna keep smoking,drinking, whatever and if I get sick, my kids better take care of me”.

Excuse Me???!!!!!!!

Need I say it? Most definitely to be continued…






























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Housing the Right Way for You

Who Listens To The Little Guy?

Who Listens To The Little Guy? (Photo credit: infomatique)


I haven’t followed the status quo thinking regarding finances because for a long time. It seems to me like the deck is stacked against you if you follow the road that’s been laid out. Then the road is re-routed and the net cut away, and you’re left dragging a mountain of debt around for decades. I’m not a Christian but I know for a  fact the Bible says “The borrower is a slave to the lender”. Not the position I want to be in, Christian or not.  Been There Done That, got the t-shirt in different colors.

The old paradigm that our parents operated under is no longer viable for anyone 65 and under and the sooner you realize this the better off you’ll be.

The main one and the biggest expense…housing. What is it they always tell you? Stretch a bit to buy a house a bit bigger than you need so you can grow into it, have room for the family gatherings, traveling visitors, etc, in the best school district and it’s an investment that increases in value.

Excuse me while I find a shovel for all that poop. 

Are you having family gatherings every day? Probably not. As a kid I know some of y’all remember either your grandparents, parents, or somebody in the family who had the “living room” or “dining room”  with the plastic covered furniture that you only pass through to get to the main area of the house, only gets used 1-4 times a year and you betta not have your behind playing in there?!!  Why call it a “living room” or “dining room”?!  There was no real living or dining being done in here on a daily basis. Not even part-time living and dining.  Sorry but this never made any sense to me as kid and I was not paying any bills so it made absolutely no sense to me when I was “encouraged” to leave home at 18-19 yrs of age having to live on my own.

Out of town or overnight guests every day? Probably not…and at that point they aren’t guest anymore and need to be contributing to the household. Again makes no sense to buy to have all that space because you can’t get a discount on your mortgage payment and property taxes based on this unused space for most of the year.

Buy a house in the best school district. Another play on your emotions. Your house in the best school district is no guarantee that your child is going to learn anything. Besides,  most if not all schooling teaches kids to be drones and makes you a slave with no time to talk to,  and teach your children about the way life really works. Then, in turn they become slaves because they don’t know what the heck is going on continuing the vicious cycle.

So, the younger generations (after the World War II generation) have been encouraged to buy too much house and renovate to have too much house with the promise of ever rising home values which they forgot to tell you meant higher prices for you. Higher prices usually means higher upkeep, higher property taxes etc.

This ideology was probably ok (emphasis on “probably” because I have my doubts that it was ever ok even for those it appeared to benefit) in an era of darn near cradle to grave job security with pensions and paid healthcare in retirement. Now unless you’ve been living under a rock, that employment scenario is rare nowadays.  And if you do manage to find it, trust me in 5-10 years it will disappear one way or another. That’s a whole ‘nother post. 

Alright, I’m not saying you should live somewhere that you are scared to go home each day but all the above reasons given to us to buy a house are IMHO the worse reasons to buy or even keep a house if it’s draining your budget. A house should not be bought as an investment like a stock or mutual fund. It’s not nor should it have ever been put in the same category. The stock market is basically a legalized casino. Most sane folks don’t take their bill money down to the casino every month.

What I am saying is a house should be first and foremost a safe place to lay your head and your place of operation to nourish and replenish yourself physically, mentally and spiritually. That’s the investment that propels you into a lifestyle which allows you to get further along your life path.  It sounds like the same thing but here is the difference. You set the value of the investment by knowing your values, not the financial talking heads who are not paying your bills. But it does take courage to get off the beaten path.   

How do you set the value? You buy with your life goals that you have determined in mind with reality firmly in mind. Choices made now have a huge effect on what the future will look like. Now this means you will have to do some work.

Is it important to you to have a place that you can show off but you are never there to enjoy it because you and your SO (significant other)  have to work 80-100 hours a week to make the mortgage and upkeep? Or would you rather have more time, cash and have a place that you and everyone in the household can clean up in an 1 hr or so?

If you are already in a house, are you straining to live every month? Is it important to keep up appearances or would you rather sleep well at night? What message do you want to teach to your children if you have any especially if they are young teenagers or young adults?

Only you can and should be the determinant of what your values are, meaning what’s important to you. What’s important to me might not be what’s important to you. I don’t know for sure but I would not be surprised if my house today if I wanted to sell it, might be worth less than the price I paid for it including the interest on the mortgage and “improvements”. That does not matter to me because the skills I have learned during the 13 years I’ve been here,  the peace of mind and quality of life gained over the last 7 years being totally debt free are priceless.  Has it been easy, heck no.  But I got some of my life back that was lost a long time ago. Also, I’ve been able to significantly lower the stress levels due to happenings within my household, mine and my husband’s family of dealing with elderly parents during that time because debt was not hanging over our heads. My house is small by today’s standards, the standards when I bought it… it’s a 2 bedroom/1 bath, I have to go outside to get to my laundry room and I have no garage. I mentioned the price and interest here.

Told ya, I don’t follow the status quo.


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Operation Lint Prevention

OK I’m back to discuss the second part in the email where I think she is asking how to prevent lint from getting into locs.

“…Secondly i am in the process of removing one of daughter’s locs due to unsightly lint, so much that when i look at it, i lose the joy! Yet, I don’t have any except at the back row. Please help!..

Again, I’m not a hair scientist so what I’m offering is my opinion based on critical thought of what I’ve observed on my hair. I think what products one uses plays a huge part in this. Commercial products containing things like mineral oil, lanolin, alcohol-the same ingredients that contributes to dry hair, seems to make our locs more of a magnet for lint.

However, some natural ingredients beeswax, and shea butter can be lint attractors as well.

A woman processes Shea tree nuts into Shea but...

A woman processes Shea tree nuts into Shea butter. Shea butter comes from the nuts of the Shea tree (Parkia biglobosa), and for women in poor rural comunities it can provide a pathway out of poverty. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Shea butter while an excellent ingredient for helping our hair and skin lock in moisture, is a little waxy in texture.  That’s what makes it a bit hard to wash out of the hair. Not a problem with loose hair-big problem with locked hair.  I don’t even have to mention beeswax.

Some oils may react on your hair this way as well.  Olive oil, castor oil and lemongrass essential oil produce that sticky and slightly waxy feel on my hair. This is something one needs to pay attention to because oils react differently on everyone’s hair because we don’t all have the same hair texture. 

I’m gonna go out on a limb and say I think some of the shampoos and conditioners that we use might also play a part in locs attracting lint. Linty clothes, hats, scarfs, pillow cases and sheets are culprits as well.

And last but certainly not least, the towels or whatever we are using to dry our locs after washing.

Have I had the problem described in the email? Yes. It’s one of the “issues” I said I was going to talk about in my 5 year update. Though it does seem like a combination of lint,  build up from products and oils that I had used in the early days of my braidlock journey.  While in the 1st year of my journey I was not using any oils, I had used bath towels to dry my locs after washing. And I had started using Dr. Bronner’s soap which has olive oil-I’ve already mentioned how olive oil works on my hair.

Bottle of Dr. Bronner's Magic Soap

Bottle of Dr. Bronner’s Magic Soap (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Then in the beginning of year 2, I started using conditioner ( the one that goes with the Suave clarifying shampoo) on my locs. I also used the Profectiv Strengther and I used a whipped coconut oil with a tiny amount of shea butter in it. None of these practices lasted long, but long enough to where I’m seeing the effects of using those items in my locs at the 4.5-5 year mark.

Now I had stopped using bath towels before the 2 year mark, briefly using a black pillow case and then I switched to ShamWow (?) towels to dry my locs. At the time I was washing my locs 2-3 times a week to combat my oily flaky scalp problem, so I need something to dry my hair during the winter.

But I’m wondering why am I having this issue when 1) my locs were short. 2) The ends of some of my back locs were hard early in my journey. 3) I rarely wear hats and the hats I did wear were black. 4) In the winter my locs were pretty much kept covered with a satin-like cap and they were a long way from my back thereby not touching my clothes. 5) I sleep on a satin-like pillowcase I made very early on in my journey.

What I’ve noticed is the raw African Black Soap has been acting like a gentle clarifier, which is a good thing. Over time, the ends that were rock hard have been gradually softening up and starting late last year-early this year, opening up. As a result, it’s coming up to the surface and/or releasing the stuff on its own. Some I have picked out which means I’ve lost some length on those locs and the locs which have done the task on their own. So yes, a frustrating setback but not enough to make me want to start my journey over.

In the recent few weeks, I’ve also done a deep clean using a bit of Dawn, yep the same Dawn that you wash dishes with, and a bit of baking soda by putting my locs in a small bucket with very hot water.  The pic in the last post, is after the deep cleanse.

English: No name baking soda

English: No name baking soda (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Since I liked the results, I decided to deep cleanse every week with baking soda only, following up with another natural gentle shampoo that I’ll review later. I still love my Black Soap but I have been using it for a little over 3 years and wanted to try something different.

So this is one of the ways I’m going to use to prevent lint/buildup in the future as I really like how the baking soda seems to encourage the stuff to come to the surface to be washed away. A step that’s probably needed with locs since it’s hair that’s very close together.. different from loose hair. And it seems to make the locs fluffy and light. Funny because I know I used baking soda to wash so I wonder if I had kept up with that practice, I might not have these issues now.

The second method  I have used for about 2.5 years now is not using anything to dry my braidlocks. When I say air dry, that’s exactly what I mean…100% air dry. Also I still sleep with my satin-like material on my pillow.

The last method is sticking with (no pun intended) a light oil that does not have a sticky feel to it on my hair.

Ooo, something else I just thought of, the moisturizer we put on our neck.  I looked back at my early pics and noticed spots in those locks at the nape of the neck…way back then. I was definitely using whipped shea butter on my body so it’s not hard to imagine that some can rub off on those nape area locs. And as most folks do-take a shower, moisturize our skin, then style our hair. Residue from the moisturizer on our hands might be ending up in our locs and not getting completely washed out on wash day. This thought occurred to me as I’m noticing my nape locs don’t seem to have this issue anymore. Maybe because I haven’t used shea butter for some time now as a moisturizer. I stopped last year during the summer as it’s too heavy for summer use and never started back during the winter. Hmmm…might be something to try-using a light oil for your neck instead of a creamy product.

I hope that gives some food for thought on what I’m doing to prevent future lint and buildup in my locs. What are some of the things you all are doing?

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